Searching for Utopia

The Hi-5 gang is coming to town. Yay!

Can’t believe I’ve got excited by such news — Adam doesn’t even care as much. And the show’s supposed to be for kids.

We missed their concert last September while we were in Indonesia. This time it’ll only be meet and greet.

But hey, it’s better than nothing. I hope we could come.

For other mommies who are also going through Hi-5 craze, you can meet them at Takashimaya, 3-13 Dec (1PM, 4PM, and 7 PM daily).

I received a mail from DBS yesterday. It said we’d get an exclusive Hi-5 plush toy if we spend $300 at Takashimaya.

Hmm–

What did you get on your wedding anniversary? Me, nothing that I couldn’t get on any other days.

In the first few years, Zsolt had always been diligent in buying me a bouquet of flowers as anniversary gift. After a while, he gave up — the poor chap.

And who could blame him,after all it’s a common knowledge that most women are flower sniffers. Isn’t it why they have that saying “say it with flowers”?

For me, though, it’s not necessary to celebrate wedding anniversary. Come on now, aren’t we supposed to celebrate our marriage everyday?

Of course I love getting gifts, but not flowers please. Methinks flowers are the easiest, most useless and predictable gifts.

Choosing a gift for somebody takes time. Many men don’t have the time — nor patience — to do it, so usually they’d just grab some red roses. It works most of the time!

But really, what can you do with flowers besides showing them off to relatives and friends? They’ll wither and die after a few days, and there goes the hubby’s hard-earned cash.

Seriously ladies, do you prefer flowers to — say, D & D books? I’d choose the books anytime!

But that’s just me. The truth is that men keep buying flowers, and women continue sniffing them like there’s no tomorrow.

Anyways, happy sixth anniversary to my husband Zsolt. Thank you for not getting me flowers.

What have you been up to?

Me, I’ve been telling people that I’m too busy to be online since Adam occupies most of my time.

But psst, that’s not totally true. With Gmarket being all the rage in Singapore right now, I’ve always spared some time to check it.

True enough, online shopping is nothing new, especially in Singapore — where most people are internet savvy. But let me tell you why Gmarket is better.

I’ve tried Amazon. The service was good, it’s just that the shipping cost a bomb. Recently I wanted to buy a bunting for Adam which cost US$14.90, which was very cheap. The only problem was that they charged US$80++ for the shipping — not to mention that the US is all the way round the world that Adam would be a man when he received the bunting.

e-bay is a little better, in a way that there are many sellers from our areas. I just think it’s a turnoff to make a bid before buying. And I may love budget shopping, but I don’t buy secondhand stuff from people — unless for books. Excuse me, but who knows what have happened to those items before. You can never be too careful, can you?

What we need is a local trustable site, which is exactly what Gmarket is. I’ve purchased several items from different merchants. So far I’m a happy customer.

But as I’ve said, I do budget shopping. So if you’re into expensive branded stuff, you don’t belong here. Otherwise, you could find cheap useful items which you might never see before. I’ve bought little romper extensions for Adam for $4 per piece. What a genius invention! Well, it depends. Actually for the same price you could even get a brand new romper. I know I did.

What’s better is that many sellers offer free delivery, including the ones from Korea. Usually your item would be delivered within 3-7 days. Meanwhile, you could contact the seller if you wished to ask questions about your purchases.

I guess I’ll still be coming back for more after all. Here’s the T-shirt I received today. I paid $5.90 for it. What do you think?

If you asked me about Manohara Odelia Pinot, 17, three months ago, I’d certainly say I had never heard of her. But within these last two months she’s probably become more famous than Susan Boyle in Indonesia.

The reason? It’s none other than her “Cinderella” story. In short, last year the girl married a thirty-year-old prince from Kelantan, Malaysia. Yet, instead of living happily ever after, she ended up locked in the palace. The prince charming allegedly abused and using her as a sex slave. She was said to have her breasts slashed and things like that . Long story short, the tale has become national headlines thanks to Mano’s mommy dearest, Daisy Fajarina.

And at last, Mano could flee from her husband while she’s in Singapore. She reportedly called the local police and pleaded for help. Now she’s back in Indonesia and already filing for divorce. Good for her.

Momma Fajarina, on the other hand, was still working her fifteen minutes of fame. Always being helpful to the press, she provided all details of the treatments received by her daughter, and ended it by saying, “No parent could be silent if their child was treated in such a barbaric way.”

Well since I’m a mother myself, I couldn’t agree more with her on that. But then again, no parent in their right mind to give consent to their underage daughter to get married at all — and especially not to a 30-year-old man!

There may only be two reasons for the marriage to be so urgent. First, if Mano couldn’t live unless she received financial support from the guy. But this is obviously not the case Mano’s situation. She’s a model, and she was actually romantically involved with Adrie Bakrie, the son of Aburizal Bakrie. Just thinking, how old was she when she started dating? Hmm, and mommy actually allowed that?

Anyways, the second reason is if Mano had unplanned pregnancy. But this is also not the case. So why Ms Fajarina didn’t ask the prince to wait is beyond me. Mano was not short of suitors, so it’s like mommy was selling her to the highest bidder.

Would she give her consent if the guy weren’t a prince? Nah! Methinks it’s clear what her motive was in marrying her daughter to this prince. She was actually the one to introduce the prince to Mano at a gala dinner hosted by the Malaysian PM when she was only 14, saying that the prince wanted to befriend her. Lame!

Many parents see their children as long-term investments. Just think of the old saying “banyak anak banyak rejeki” or “many children, much fortune’, which means children are the major source of income. In other words, children must repay their parents — usually materially. Of course there’s nothing wrong with children helping their parents, especially when they can afford it. But it’s not okay to ask them to give more than what they could.

Don’t forget, parents may choose whether or not they want a child — and not the opposite.

I was just taking Adam for an afternoon stroll around the pool downstairs. As well as meeting his usual friends, we saw a middle-aged woman with his (I think) grandson.

Me: “So cute. What’s his name?”
Woman: “******. Are you Indonesian or Filipino?”
Me: “Indonesian.”
Woman: “But you can speak English, ah?”
Me: (Quickly before she thought I were Adam’s nanny) “I can, my husband is European.”
Woman: “Oooh!” (looking confused)
Woman: “So the baby is Chinese, rite?”
Me: “*$@^&^$#+_>X”:!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

I’m feeling a bit sentimental at the moment. Yesterday I heard my neighbor played an old song from Backstreet Boys. It goes something like this:

I’ll never break your heart
I’ll never make you cry
I’d rather die than live without you
…

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not gonna talk about how much I was into Nick Carter (yuck!!!!). It’s just that the song brought back memories from more than ten years ago — that is when I was still in school.

What did you hate the most in school? I had a lot to hate but one of them is the flag ceremony held every Monday morning. You know, students and teachers must stand for 30 minutes to sing national anthem, listening to speeches yadda yadda yadda.

I never know who first had the idea of enforcing it to schools and all institutions. Mr. Suharto? Anyways, I used to envy students in the USA — those whom I saw from movies. They didn’t have to wear uniform, they never had ceremonies, they never had to salute their teachers.

Overall, I thought ceremony was utterly useless. Oh, if you haven’t known, its purpose was said to boost our patriotism — our love to the nation. But most students like me couldn’t see it. Many of us would make up excuses just to skip it.

“Look at those Western people. They love their nations, even if they never have such ceremonies,” or so we thought.

Ten years later, who would’ve thought that listening to those songs we used to sing in the ceremony would have different effect. Take this one:

I don’t know about you who are lucky enough to be able to live your lives in Indonesia. But for those who have been away for years, like myself, such songs are enough to reduce me to tears. They brought back the memories of my childhood. And they remind me so much of Indonesia — of the morning dew, of the way people still know each other by names so you won’t need GPS, of everything. If there were bad things, they’re all forgiven (mostly).

Di sana tempat lahir beta
dibuai, dibesarkan bunda
Tempat berlindung di hari tua
sampai akhir menutup mata

Given my current circumstances, Singapore is the right place to live in. But I still miss Indonesia. I miss tempe gembus. I miss my cat Temon. I miss becak.

I’m just feeling sentimental.

Is this the result after doing that ceremony for twelve years? The person who created it must have been a genius.

I’m thinking of getting my hair done very soon — that is like er, tomorrow or the day after. Unfortunately, I still can’t make up my mind about what I want to do with it.

Since I was still expecting Adam, I had actually planned to perm my hair again after a satisfactory visit to Jean Yip at Bugis Junction.

However, I then went to Jean Yip Tampines, and the hairdresser could convince me that I should rebond my hair instead. Perm definitely needs lots of extra attention, and she said once I had a baby, there would be no time for that. Good point. Sadly, I’ve been obsessed with Angela Zhang’s permed hair as you could see on the picture .

So now I’m torn between the two. What do you think, what should I do?

Rebonding:
- Expensive
- Easy to maintain
- Pretty

Perm:
- Very expensive
- Very high maintenance
- Very pretty

We’re selling our car, folks. If any of you happened to plan to buy one or know somebody who planned to buy, choose ours!

It might be a two-year old car, but Zsolt is a very careful owner, I can assure you. He pampered this car more than me. It’s like a second wife for him.

The reason we are selling it? Zsolt is looking to buy a new second wife So please, please, please click here for more details.

When Adam arrived, people’s reactions were mostly curious about how he’d look. Is he like his daddy? Does he take after his mommy?

The answer is yes, for both actually. Adam is the splitting image of Zsolt when he was a baby — but with slanted black eyes. Oh, and tan skin! Oh well, I mean darker, since he never really has sunbathed. But in overall, people would say he’s a caucasian baby.

Have you ever wished that your children would look more like you?

I’m actually happy that Adam takes after his daddy (well, if he were black then Zsolt might ask for a DNA test :p). That being said, some people just can’t believe that I’m actually Adam’s mommy, and not his maid.

When we went to the Indonesian embassy, for example, the security guard simply ignored my questions and chose to spoke in English to Zsolt. I bet he thought I was Zsolt’s maid, and we were going to apply for a new passport for me.

No offense for maids who happen to read this post. There’s nothing wrong with being a maid, really. If you’re an Indonesian woman who lives in Singapore, there are times when somebody asked whether you’re a maid. I’ve got used to that, considering that many maids are from Indonesia.

It’s just a case when a mommy wants to be acknowledged where acknowledgment is due.

Maybe next time I’d want twins, like these incredible twins — then there’d be no more mistaking. One would look like me, and another is like Zsolt :p What do you think?

Zsolt has been having back pain for over a year now. After doing some reading online, it turned out to be quite common problem for those with similar jobs — geeks, that is.

Heaven knows how he can be stubborn sometimes. I’ve been telling him to talk to doctors about this problem, but he just shrugged it off. He said nothing could help.

Honestly I don’t know much about such problems. But today I read about chiropractic, and I came across this site, San Antonio Chiropractor. It seems like this might be a good solution for him. Researches said it’s generally safe, unless if
you have osteoporosis.

The only problem is that we are not living in San Antonio, so we’d need to get another chiropractor somewhere closer. Anyone familiar with this treatment in Singapore?

Fancy having several newborn rats fell right onto your chicken curry plate? Well, you could ask Madam Dong:

SHE was enjoying her lunch at the coffee shop when she suddenly shrieked - a newborn rat had fallen right into her plate of curry rice.

The shocking incident took place at 2pm on Sunday in a coffee shop at Block 446, Pasir Ris Drive 6, Lianhe Wanbao reported.

Customers said they heard a strange noise coming from the ceiling while they were having their meals.

When they looked up, they saw something small and pink falling through a crack in the ceiling - right onto Madam Dong’s plate.

Madam Dong, who declined to reveal her age, said: ‘I didn’t know what it was initially. When I looked closer, I realised that it was a newborn rat.

‘Its eyes were closed and it wriggled slowly. I could even see its heart beating.’

The good news is that I’m lucky enough not to witness this myself. The bad news is, I live near that area. And this wasn’t the first time I read such news. A few months back similar case happened at a McDonald’s outlet I sometimes patronized in Tampines. They also fell from the ceiling.

That is strange, eh? Rat is not usually associated to cleanliness. Yet, Singapore, being the cleanest country in the world stil can’t free herself from rats attack. Not just in HDB, I’ve seen some around our condo too.

OK, maybe it’s difficult to exterminate rats which live outdoor. But I’d think that those in the ceilings would be easier to handle. One thing they could do is perhaps cover the ceilings. I’ve noticed that in many public places here, they leave the ceilings opened. Well, rats are the last thing I want to be on my plate for sure.

What about you, would you return to the same eatery after experiencing such a thing? Ratatouille, anyone?

Who is the most famous male celeb in Singapore at this moment? I should think it’s Brunei-born actor, singer, model, gym instructor–at least Wikipedia said so–Wu Chun. As I noticed, he’s been visiting Singapore several times in a year. Only less than two weeks ago he and his Taiwanese boyband Fahrenheit came to town. We missed it–not that I’m a big fan though. It’s just fun to meet a celeb, as long as it’s free :p

I remember once Zsolt even had to accompany me to go for Wu Chun hunting at Bugis Junction. But thanks to the traffic jam (who said Singapore had the best traffic?), it took more than an hour for us to go there. By the time we arrived, everyone had just gone to Junction 8. So we quickly went to Junction 8, and we found the place to be so quiet. Only the next day we read online that it was somewhere on level 4. Oh well, no luck. We couldn’t sell his autograph on e-bay.

So what’s the fuss about him? His acting skill is mediocre, methinks. His songs are ok, easy-listening, maybe. Just don’t expect you’d hear something like Michael Buble’s :p But anyway, it’s enough to make teen girls scream his name. Pretty much like Zac Efron in the USA, I guess, his hair is his best feature.

How do you make such hairdo, by the way?–Wondered if I could cut Adam’s hair like that

I know parking can be expensive in Singapore, but what would you do if you’re charged $73,695 for a 1 hour parking like this person?

One thing you could do to avoid paying parking is–don’t use car!

If you can’t resist it, like us, then maybe get yourself a CapitaCard from DBS. Only last week we received free parking for three months after charging our hospital bill to that card. Thanks to the hospital, we even became one of the top spenders–not that we were happy about it though.

Another tip to get free parking is: go out only on Sunday and public holidays, and park only on HDB carpark

These are places which offer free parking for visitors: IMM (only for the first 3 hours), UE Square (on Sunday), Turf Club, Singapore Zoo–oh and HDB, as I mentioned before.

Many girls see models like Kate Moss or Heidi Klum as fashion goddesses. I bet they’d kill to look like them. Funnily enough, I think Kate Moss’ look is average at best. Heidi Klum is better, but I wouldn’t consider her a goddess still.

I don’t have any specific celeb whose fashion sense I wanted to follow. I do drool over those Korean girls on tv though. They have the cutest dresses and the most gorgeous hairdos.

Korean outfit is not really very expensive. For $40 you can already purchase a very good trench coat, which can be $200 in Europe. But Korean hairdo is a different story. Check this girl’s permed hair, for example. Isn’t it simply gorgeous? I’ll certainly go for this look one day. Of course, in Singapore it doesn’t come cheap. Last year I had my hair permed and the total damage was more than $400 :p

What do you think, is it worth it?

Still being in confinement, lately I haven’t followed much news. Two days ago Zsolt passed me this article, and it really breaks my heart to read it:

“After 21 days at the Children’s Intensive Care Unit (ICU) at KK Women’s and Children’s Hospital (KKH), baby Rizal Idris breathed his last.

He was barely a month old.

The baby, who weighed 2.93kg at birth on 27 Nov, had been fighting for his life because of a bacterial infection that his mother had caught while she was carrying him.

His mother did not know that she was suffering from a vaginal infection that affects about 14 per cent of pregnant women here. She gave birth to him at KKH.

Baby Rizal suffered from what is known as Group B Streptococcus Infection (GBS). It was passed on from his mother, Madam Norashikin Latiff, 31, during delivery.”

This could happen to anyone. I was also tested positive for this GBS, but I was more fortunate because I opted for C-section–not just because of this infection, but other complications too.

I did panic when I heard of my test result. I can relate to Madam Latiff. In many cases doctors seem to be too busy to take some time to explain to their patients. In my case, my gynae hardly spent more than five minutes with me — sometimes even less. Fortunately both Adam and I are healthy.

At times I found it difficult to accept than one moment I was told I had an infection, and the next minute I was told to calm down as if nothing happened. I’m sure it’s only because the doctor had too many patients in line, but patients are paying, aren’t they? In general I feel like many of my questions went unanswered as she was always in a hurry to dismiss me, and the nurses were impatient and quick-tempered. I won’t return there ever again, and if all patients think like I do, then she’d lose her cash-machine.

Anyways, my thoughts go with baby Rizal’s family. And perhaps this is an eye opener for the rest of us. It’s very important for us, mommies, to find the right gynae. And even if we have, don’t forget to get second opinion when you’re in doubt.